Just when you thought being an American couldn’t be any more embarrassing…
T’s Lounge in West Palm Beach has sued Nadya Suleman, who had agreed to dance topless in eight shows that were to begin Wednesday. The club is seeking an emergency injunction to keep her from appearing at a competing club.
The dispute began almost as soon as Suleman signed a contract June 3 to appear at T’s Lounge in what was being billed as her “first feature dance appearance.” Two days later, a representative for Suleman sent notice she was cancelling because she was angered by a television interview in which a club bartender called her “crazy.”
“She will not be defamed by the club that was booking her, nor walk into a bad situation,” the message said.
Suleman’s contract says she must give 35 days’ notice. The lawsuit says she only gave 34. The contract also bars Suleman from appearing at another strip club within 50 miles and 90 days of the scheduled appearances in West Palm Beach.
A copy of the contract is attached to the court filing, but the amount Suleman was to be paid has been removed.
T’s Lounge is suing for an amount in excess of $15,000. It claims the exact damages stemming from Suleman’s cancellation are “unascertainable” and that she caused “irreparable harm.”
Meanwhile, ads cajoling men to “Come See Octomom Take it Off” have appeared in advance of her scheduled appearance Friday in nearby Broward County. Frank Cerabino, a columnist for The Palm Beach Post, has characterized it as “a fight between neighboring South Florida counties for the bragging rights — or maybe it’s sagging rights.”
I’ve never proclaimed to understand how straight men think. But dayum. Y’all will just pay money to look at anything so long as tits are involved. To be honest, every straight man reading this should kind of feel some residual shame right now. If one man on this planet is looking at Octomom with a boner, all of you should feel a twinge of “man, we really are pathetic.”
I would like to see the math that went into this $15,000 lawsuit though. Anywhere else in the country, having Nadya Damn Suleman in your establishment removing articles of clothing would cause your business irreparable harm. But not in Florida. In Florida, your business is hurt if she doesn’t show up and get naked. Because Florida is not of this world. Florida was placed here by aliens to attract all of the crazies and undesirables. And when the aliens need entertainment, they just say “Oh hey, let’s check in on Florida.”
I’ma give this trick another 16 months before some third-rate porn star tanked up on Viagra is running up in that on some milf site. She has now completely put herself on that slippery slope to popshots on the face.