I’m dead ass serious. This heffah refuses to get her shit together.

I will be the first to admit that I think Casper Smart is PHOINE. Okay? Like. Yes, J-Lo, get that. You take that little boy and you ride that child until the wheels fall off, you hear me? Wear his ass out…and then move on to the next, Jennifer. What you NOT supposed to do is forfeit the last teensy bit of credibility you have in order to get him a reality show.

Chippendales *finally* has a HOT has-been celebrity joining the club.

Joey Lawrence is taking it all off … or most of it at least … because the 90s heartthrob just inked a deal with the man-stripper crew at Chippendales in Vegas.

A rep for the beefcake brigade tells TMZ, the 36-year-old former “Blossom” star will don the legendary bow tie … and not much else … for a special engagement at the Rio from June 7th-24th. (cont.)

I’m still scarred for life after those Chippendale pics of Jeremy Jackson being traffic cone orange, but this will go a long way to alleviate my distress. Joey Lawrence and his big gay face can still get it.

Also: What is with all these celebrities taking their clothes off today? The recession is really Real, you guys.

To everyone taking shots at Jenny McCarthy for posing in Playboy again, I have one question:

Have you SEEN Jenny McCarthy lately???

If I looked like that, I wouldn’t own clothes. Two pasties and some dental floss and I would be go to go.

This is what The Superficial had to say:

Like most scientists, Jenny McCarthy just wants the respect of her peers and to be acknowledged for her tireless research in the field of medical science. Which explains why she agreed to show her tits for money in the July issue of Playboy like the reputable academic she is. Also, everyone knows posing for Penthouse is how you catch autism, and seriously, fuck that.

#BitchPlease

Don’t be salty cause you ugly.

Regardless of how you feel about Jenny and her acting skills or her (misplaced) activism, that trick looks good naked. And she’s BEEN looking good naked for twenty whole years now. Look at all these pictures from her past Playboy shoots, and I dare you to talk smack.

An Open Letter to Whitney Houston’s Family.

Dear Bobby Brown, Bobbi Kristina, and The Houston Family.

Sit. Down. And let Whitney Houston rest in peace.

Wait, tell me again why you like Rihanna?

I know I promised to lay off of her, but I just A) Saw SNL from last week and B) Heard Chris Brown’s new freestyle calling her a bitch and I just need some Rihanna stans to lay it out for me what it is about Rih Rih that you like so much.

I mean.

Can we first talk about these performances please???

Look at this photo.

“I can basically see your whole penis” husband material, Shemar Moore.

I mean, there is a sideways baseball cap, a peace sign, sunglasses, and a plastic cup of cheap booze and fruit juice…basically everything I do not miss about frat parties in the South.

But Shemar Moore is still fine. How many years has it been since we first realized he was fine on the Young & the Restless? Twenty? And he is still this fine?

I swear if he had kids with Stacey Dash, those brats would look eight years old forever because they obviously have anti-aging genes.

(Source: dlisted.com)

No Doubt is back!

No Doubt to release first album in a decade in September
By Piya Sinha-Roy
Reuters
5:10 p.m. CDT, May 7, 2012

LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - California pop-rock band No Doubt will be making their long-anticipated return to music this September with a new album on September 25, the band said on their website over the weekend.

The group, formed of lead singer Gwen Stefani, guitarist Tom Dumont, bassist Tony Kanal and drummer Adrian Young, will be release their first record in more than a decade following 2001’s “Rock Steady.” (cont.)

YAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wayment, hollup……why is everybody so excited? Did we all forget that they weren’t that great?

John Travolta has an 8 inch wang.

I’m pretty sure that’s in Gay Internet Inches though, so it’s probably more like six. Either way, he allegedly tickled some balls and started whacking it in front of a masseur and the accuser says Travolta is packing 8 inches surrounded by pubic hair that is “wiry and unkempt.”

Well. John started going bald a long time ago so I guess he wanted to keep some hair somewhere. :-/