rafi-dangelo

Santorum says stop attacking Christians, while Louisiana schools teach Christian fundamentalism.

I need for everybody on the Christian Right to get on the same page, please. Either we atheists are attacking you and taking away all of your rights and trying to re-shape America into the image of Satan (who, by the way, we also don’t even believe in because duh), or you feel fully justified in taking taxpayers’ money to teach very obvious lies.

It can’t be both. You can’t cry “religious oppresion!” one day while you send impressionable students off to learn that dinosaurs and people existed at the same time the next.

Maybe I just randomly retained a lot of junior high math lessons.

Are these hard questions?

(3x3)(4x2) =
Change 2.5kg to grams.
A square has an area of 169 squared feet. What is the length of each side?

Maybe I just have a skewed perception of the math skills of grown adults with professional jobs who went through years and years of college, but I feel like those should be no-brainers.

Apparently, I’m mistaken, at least in the case of Fox News anchors.

Today in Mississippi: Prayer in Schools! (Maybe?)

Last week: Oops, we forgot to make slavery illegal here! My bad.
This week: Let’s try to sneak Jesus back into the school system.

Supporters say bills to guarantee religious freedom in Mississippi public schools are meant to ensure students can talk about spiritual beliefs and aren’t deprived of their rights.

…It’s clear that advocates for the measure, especially those outside the Legislature, believe it would clear the way for student-led prayer before groups.

“People ask me if this is a step toward getting prayer back in schools. I think this is THE step to get prayer back in schools,” said Paul Ott, who hosts religion-flavored radio and television programs about hunting, fishing and the outdoors.

(source via JMG)

Because that’s what Mississippi needs, more Jesus in the class room. Clearly the politicians there have their priorities in the right place, because students need to feel comfortable enough to spread their indoctrination to other impressionable minds who don’t have an overbearing fairy-tale-teller waiting at home for them. They must find a way to make it OK for public prayer in schools.

Michelle Obama is fat and queers are an abomination.

Bob Grisham is a football coach at an Alabama high school and he hates queers and Michelle Obama. Let me go put on my shocked face.

Philadelphia is tired of pregnant children.

Some schools get new computers in the library. Some schools get new bleachers for the gym. Some schools get new equipment for the science lab. Philadelphia schools are done with that. After Christmas break, students in 22 Philadelphia public schools are coming back to classes with brand new free condom dispensers!

Where were these when I was in school? I used to get a Mountain Dew and a Reese’s every day from our vending machine. Imagine how much fun I could’ve had with free condoms! (making water balloons of course, because the only other gay person I knew when I came out was deeply closeted yet still smelled like Elizabeth Taylor’s White Diamonds and had inch-long fingernails).

These two high-school boys from AZ were forced to hold hands as a punishment.

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Arizona is really showing out this week.

An Arizona school district has condemned the in-school discipline at one of its high schools after two boys were forced to hold hands in front of their classmates as a punishment for fighting.

Earlier this week, the two students at Westwood High School in Mesa, Ariz., who have not been named, were faced with the prospect of either suspension from school, or sitting in chairs in the high school’s courtyard and holding hands for 15 minutes during a lunch period. They opted for the latter.

Today in God’s Love: Stoning kids for going to a secular school

Members of a Christian sect in New Jerusalem, a small town in central Mexico, burned down the only public school building in town last month. Now that the beginning of the school calendar has passed, teachers attempted to hold classes in private homes, only to be pelted by stones. They say the Virgin of the Rosary told them schools were built by the devil.

What was that thing about religion being a mental illness?

Let’s play Are You Smarter Than a Christian!

(You’ll probably win against this one…)

This is always a fun game. Let’s start with a definition:

a·non·y·mous [uh-non-uh-muhs] adjective

without any name acknowledged, as that of author, contributor, or the like: an anonymous letter to the editor; an anonymous donation.
of unknown name; whose name is withheld: an anonymous author.
lacking individuality, unique character, or distinction: an endless row of drab, anonymous houses.

Say you’re an overly zealous teacher full of God’s Grace, working in a public high school. You find out some students want to form an atheist group at your high school and clearly you can’t let that happen.

You put the kibbosh on that.

But what good is ending it if no one knows about what you did? So, you write an anonymous letter to the atheist author of the student’s devil-worshiping material bragging about how you single-handedly stamped out atheism at your school. Except…you forgot what anonymous means. You idiot.