Four Tops “I Can’t Help Myself (Sugar Pie Honey Bunch)”
On this day in 1965, the Four Tops scored their first number one hit on the Billboard Hot 100.
I would like to dedicate this song to my boyfriend and love of my life Pillsbury Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough — in the tube not those gross little squares.
Remember when you thought Brett Scallions was super hot and now you look back like “how do you even bleach to that color blonde? Is he wearing flares? Can that nosering be any bigger?”
Can we go back to 19eightywhatever when black men could dance around in videos and still be the leading man? I’m over mean-muggin. Pebbles Perri Holyghost Reid was not about to let some scowling, saggypantsed thug into her Mercedes. She was not about that Angry Rapper Life. Give her a Pretty Boy With an S-Curl Who Studied Modern Dance so they can go shopping and get their hair did together. I ain’t mad atcha, Ms. Pebbles.
A lot of female pop stars have released music videos this month and I am so disappoint. What happened to pop? Why is everything so boring, awkward, and/or uncomfortable?
Mariah Carey “#Beautiful” feat. Miguel
Mariah…is really trying. Hard. Hashtag Beautiful is Hashtag Boring and Neck-Breaka Miguel isn’t adding anything other than sugarsweetsyrup to this with his lil swishy behind. This video though. Mariah playing an innocent sex kitten at sixty-seven years old is so uncomfortable to watch. She has the right to wear whatever she wants…I just wish she wanted to wear more. She’s just so unsexy. She doesn’t even move sexy. Stop trying to be sexy all the time. You aren’t Janet. Nobody is checking for your midriff, I promise you.
I feel like I can’t really connect with anyone who hasn’t sung this song in the car with the windows rolled down and the volume on 800 and really gotten in touch with your inner Angsty Bald White Man.
So. Remember the second season of America’s Next Top Model? Think hard to when Tyra Banks thought she could become a popstar and everybody was like…
Well, I’m not sure whether you know this or not, but Naomi Campbell had already BeenThere DoneThat TheyLovedMeInJapan ten years earlier. In the spirit of competition, as well as internet cattiness and holiday boredom…who had the better video?
Things you probably didn’t know about this boss lady, Joyce “Fenderella” Irby.
— Bassist and co-lead singer for Klymaxx. — Helped Jimmy Jam & Terry Lewis and Babyface & LA Reid open offices in Atlanta, jumpstarting the city as a R&B hotspot for music. — Signed Dallas Austin to her management company while he produced TLC and Boyz II Men’s first albums — Signed/discovered both Sammie and Lloyd
Watch this video.
