NOTE: That’s not a typo. I didn’t mean to write “don’t put your penis in random things” because we’re about to talk about urethral sounding for a quick second. Some 70-year old Aussie had to go to the hospital to have a FORK removed from his urethra, and it is really gross. Keep on reading at your own risk.
On the A line
Catching a nap
On the way to the Heights
And when it gets there
You better wake up
Cause the train will go back down
To where it came from
Can we make a note of this disclaimer at the beginning real quick?
THE PRODUCTS USED IN THIS VIDEO CONTAINS LYE
IT IS NOT SAFE TO USE ON FACE
IT CAN CAUSE SERIOUS DAMAGE OR BLINDNESS
DO NOT TRY THIS!!!
What is this, the Old Black Lady version of Jackass?
Boooyyyy do I have a deal for you! And I’m letting you in on this totally for your own benefit and not because there’s a $1,000 incentive for myself plus free Lasik. This is me being totally generous and concerned with your happiness.
If you are a white female college graduate who is under 34, childless, and a size zero, you may be lucky enough to be chosen as a life partner by Dr. Emil Chynn:
Visual representation of skinny boys cuddling.
I mean…I’m skinny. What I look like trying to hug some twigs? Not here for your 28 inch waist. Nope.
I love food. But I’m trynna eat it. I’m not trynna eat it with your slobber all over it though. I get so bothered when people in porn like take a bite of a strawberry and then start making out. Like……..no. When is it sexy to have somebody’s chewed up bits of food in your mouth? I’m not a baby bird.