Look what Humans of New York tried to put over on us today:
“It’s our first date. We met on Fire Island. I wasn’t even planning on going out that night. I’d already drank half a bottle of Johnny Black so I was just going to stay in and read my Chelsea Handler book, but my friends promised to bake me cookies if I went to the club with them. So I went to buy three bags of cookie dough, and when I finally got to the club all my friends were making out with somebody, so I was like ‘this sucks,’ and I just started dancing by myself and eating the cookie dough. Then I saw him by the DJ booth and we made eye contact so I went over and started sharing my cookie dough. We never actually spoke. Then a few months later I ran into him on the subway.”
(Facebook: Humans of New York)
HONY thought it would be cute to substitute “cookie dough” for cocaine without even realizing how ridiculous that lie is. Ain’t nobody eating a bag of cookie dough out with their friends on Fire Island. A bag of warm-ass cookie dough in a gay club. What intern from Oklahoma thought that was cute? Let me tell you how that evening really went.
“It’s our first actual date with actual words. The first doesn’t count because we only swapped blowjobs that we barely remember in the Meat Rack out on Fire Island. I wasn’t even planning on going out that night. I’d already drank half a bottle of Johnny Black so I was just going to stay in and vaguely glance at my Chelsea Handler book while waiting on a Scruff notification from someone I’d actually let come over and plow me, but my friends promised me coke if I went out with them, and not the regular kind. Good stuff. Like Wall Street coke. They text me the guy’s address to go pick it up and they’d pay me back when I got to the club, so I picked up three bags. When I finally got to the club, all my friends were making out with somebody, so I was like ‘I have all this coke to myself and I’m already drunk’ so I started dancing by myself and doing keybumps in the corner. Then I saw him by the DJ booth and we made eye contact so I went over to see if he was into blow too. We never actually spoke. A few bumps turned into blowjobs and then a few months later I saw him on Grindr here in the city and he was 250 ft away.”
Watch: Kids Ask About Gender
“Do you like being called a boy or a girl?”
Courtney Act is a gift to this world. She’s so good at talking to anyone, and everyone looking to be a queer ambassador should be following her lead. She’s not trying to be Oprah and pull out your deepest trauma. She’s not trying to be Dr. Phil to coach you into realizations with psychobabble. She never comes from a place of preaching, just existing and being authentic.
Carl Nassib is the NFL’s first active gay player.
Another pride month win for representation!
Las Vegas Raiders defensive end Carl Nassib came out of the closet earlier today and his statement almost brought me to tears.
Nothing he said was particularly emotional, but it just took me back to junior high school, having rocks thrown at me, getting into fights on the bus, hearing faggot every day, and seeing no way past the torture of being bullied by jocks who thought it was fun to beat up on the gay kid.
It was just cool to beat up on the gay kid. Whether you were actually homophobic or not didn’t matter — you bullied the gay kid because other guys bullied the gay kid and that’s just how it was. It’s not as cool as it once was. Homophobia still exists, but outright support also exists in a way I didn’t experience, and sometimes that counterbalance is all you need for a homophobe to seethe quietly since he doesn’t have enough peers to feed into the bullying.
I’m trying to picture how I would have felt in junior high if an NFL player came out and his commissioner, coach, and teammates were all behind him. I probably would’ve been bullied anyway, to some extent at least, but I definitely would’ve believed it actually does get better, because I didn’t at the time. Saying “it gets better” doesn’t mean anything to a kid who wants to die because he’s the only gay person he knows, he dreads facing his peers because he doesn’t know if someone will light his homework on fire or hit him with a flagpole, and the only gay people on TV are fictional comic relief. Seeing a gay man in the center of a hypermasculine, heterosexual, aggressive environment means much more. It means not everyone is out to get you and you won’t be tortured forever, because if he can find support in the NFL, you can find support somewhere too.
Casey Frey has a boyfriend.
Watch his coming out video on Theo Von’s podcast. The kids are so blessed!
I know who Casey Frey is, because I’m online all the time, but I don’t really know who Casey Frey is. I just have a passing recognition of him and I can pick him out of a lineup because every once in awhile, one of his “dancing” videos goes viral.
Back in the days of Vine, Casey amassed a huge following from his awkward dance clips that were oddly charming in that Gen Z way of being earnest and silly at the same time. Now he’s a bonafide Instagram comedian, but I don’t follow him, because I’m pretty dry and subdued, and I don’t think very many people are funny enough to watch over and over (or at all!).
The kids who do follow him had that young man trending for a couple of days in a row because he has a boyfriend now.
CASEY FREY HAS A BOYFRIEND!! BOY!!!FRIEND!!!nature is healing pic.twitter.com/tkcUKCf4kR— kelise (@freelancepharm) June 14, 2021
I had never put much thought into who Casey Frey sleeps with. I just assumed he was straight because, if he was queer, he would’ve popped up on my social media feeds more often from being shared by the gays in my social networks. The few times I saw his sexuality discussed, it was usually a gay man either alluding to Casey’s queerness or making a light-hearted joke about it and they would immediately be corrected by his fans. So, Casey coming out with a boyfriend made a big ripple on social media.
I really don’t care. I don’t even know anything about him past what I just Googled.
What I do care about is his coming out video with Theo Von, who some of you Gen X and Millennials may remember from Road Rules.
Not gonna even front: I had a huge crush on Theo growing up. He was a Southern good ol’ boy (my weakness at the time) who was genuinely nice, wasn’t a bigot, and read books. And he had nice arms. I’ve lo-key followed his career as a comedian and I still think he’s genuinely charming but don’t tell anybody I said that because we do not praise straight white men in this household!
Casey went on Theo’s podcast and I want y’all to watch how casually he comes out as bisexual and how everyone reacts to it.
No one cares. Look at that! No one cares!
When I saw that clip yesterday, I surprised myself by how emotional I got. I just remember growing up in the South with Theo’s accent all around me calling me a faggot on a regular basis. Straight guys tortured me for years. I saw a couple of gays on the Real World, Queer as Folk, and Will & Grace, but that was about it for my exposure to queerness in the big bad world. No part of my brain would’ve thought that twenty years later, a male comedian presumed to be straight would be on another straight male comedian’s radio show and casually say he has a boyfriend.
I’m so happy the little gay boys in conservative pockets of the country facing taunts and bullying have clips like this. It doesn’t necessarily affect what’s happening to you in that moment day to day, but it’s gotta be so nice to see that there is a wider world where everyone doesn’t hate you.
As Theo says in the clip, “That’s awesome.”
Simone Biles and the Twisties.
Adventures in rehab.
99% of COVID deaths in the US are unvaccinated.
Take this Jim Crow era literacy test for Black people.
99% of COVID deaths in the US are unvaccinated.
A long weekend.
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